West Coast Smoker

I've always wanted to visit West Coast America. California, Oregon, Washington. In fact, I just want to do all fifty states at some point. There's probably something cool to see in all of them, not necessarily all as sparkly and mental as Las Vegas or New York, but still, something quirky and interesting. Like, Connecticut has Yale, that might be cool to visit. California has California girls, so DEFINITELY worth a look there!

My parents always like to take us on holiday to the same places every time. New York, Florida, Caribbean. New York and Caribbean aren't for the touristy thing though, we go for family. So, that hardly counts as a holiday - you get to spend a couple of weeks in other people's living rooms instead of your own, except they don't get the BBC and all their TV is interrupted every five minutes by adverts of erectile dysfunction and weight loss pills if you're Stateside, or every ten minutes by soft drink and carnival ads in the Caribbean. Redeeming feature: the carnival ads have pretty girls wearing next to nothing dancing. (Apparently it's okay to say that cos I'm not a guy.)

Anyway, the point is, they go to the same places every time. It's nice, and I quite like it, but I get bored. But, I guess they like that we go to the same places every time. Like, you know what you'll get, if you just go to I-Drive every other year and go to the same Disney/Universal theme parks.

I remember last time though, things had changed a bit. The first time I went, I was about 8 or 9 when I went the first time, so it was like a fucking paradise. Last time I went was the summer before university so, I was 18 and a half. I guess I just saw everything as an exercise in using pester power to line the pockets of some CEO somewhere.

I can see why they'd choose to the same places every time though. You don't have to worry about the culture being too removed, you don't have to bring phrasebooks, you can recognise the letters and the signposts. It's just like being at home, except people say "candy" and "elevator" and the bacon is too crispy and inedible.

You do miss out on exciting stuff, though. Trying new foods, learning a language on the fly, adjusting to unusual social customs; there's the chance of learning lots and gaining funny tales to tell later when you get home (even if they're anything but funny at the time!)

So, you have a choice. Safety and the potential for mind-numbing boredom, or mild terror and the reward of finding out something new you actually quite like.

I'll take mild terror for $200, Alex.